When I Hold You Now
by Ghost of a Heart that Once Was
Summary: Spova one-shot//"When I hold you, I think back to all the times . . . to everything mean you said to me, and all the things we’ve been through..."// Sprx reflects back... Nothing more I can say...


**Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN THIS SHOW!!! I DO, in fact, own a cooki- no, I just ate the cookie. Life **_**was**_** good. Now I have a void in my heart that only a cookie can fill . . . **_***tears***_** RANDOMNESS!!! But I still want another cookie. ^~^**

**In this fanfic, please pretend that the Hyperforce members sleep in beds, instead of those weird pod-like thingies. Why don't they have regular beds? Also, this is a post-SK War fic. R&R!**

**S.P.R.X.-77's P.O.V. WARNING!!! Slight O.O.C-ness-osity! But I'm writing this AFTER the war, so Sprx would probably be more serious . . . maybe . . . NO FLAMES!!!**

* * *

Man, Nova, you are so beautiful. It's almost three a.m. and I still can't sleep. I used to have nights like this all the time, but instead of _dreaming_ about having you in my arms to make it better, you actually _are_ in my arms!

I can feel your body expand with each intake of breath, your heart beating against your ribs in a slow, steady rhythm. You make small noises sometimes, inaudible mumbles and murmurs.

When I hold you like this, and the world's got this warm, heavy feeling, everything seems muffled and cozy. When I hold you, I think back to all the times . . . to everything mean you said to me, and all the things we've been through, especially in more recent times.

Over and over again in battle, you proved to everyone that you were strong, that you didn't need help. I watched you fight, and I was amazed. You put so much emotion into it . . . anger, hatred, love, and pain. They helped fuel you to fight, to keep going! I have never seen anyone so passionate to protect something.

There were times when I wanted to quit, just throw in the towel . . . I'm sure we all had those times, but then I looked at you, and saw the different emotions swirling around in your eyes . . . I just completely forgot about wanting to give up. I stayed, even though every fiber of my being was screaming at me to run, to hide, I stayed for _you_, Novs. I stayed for the same reason I put up with the countless number of beatings you gave me, for the same reason I stood there behind an iron mask and took the endless amount of insults you threw at me, each one cutting into my heart. I love you.

When I hold you now, and everything's calm, I look down at you, and I'm left speechless. Your golden fur is stained silver in the moonlight, your metal parts glisten and shine, throwing tiny reflections into the tangle of sheets we lie under. Your mouth is turned up in a slight smile; I fight back the urge to put my mouth on yours. Man, Nova, you look like an angel to me. I can't believe how lucky I am.

I never would've forgiven me, after what I did to you, the Team, the whole world! I never even would've been able to be forgiven if it weren't for you. You brought me back.

"_I love you too much to loose you!"_

Eight words that shattered the darkness. Eight words that shone brighter than one thousand suns. Eight words that told me that you really cared for me. Eight words that . . . that helped guide me back to you. To good. To the Team. Thank you, so much, Nova.

When I hold you now, I forget the world. Only you and I exist. When I hold you, I think about all the things that I'm grateful for . . . you, the Team, the forgiveness and acceptance of you all . . . I'm better at being grateful now. When I hold you, all my troubles melt away. When I hold you . . .

"Mm-mmm . . . Sprx?"

Dang, you're awake.

"Yeah babe? Did I wake you up?"

"Nah, I guess I just shifted wrong or something," you tell me, turning your head to face me and stretching your arms a bit "What're you still doing up?"

"Holding the greatest girl in the whole universe."

"Mmm . . . go back to bed, Sparky." you say, turning your head back and curling into a ball.

"I'm serious," I tell you, and you shift back so that we're nose to nose. "Really. I don't deserve you. You're strong and smart and beautiful and just so amazing . . . Without you, I wouldn't be here right now. I owe you so much . . ."

"Sprx . . ."

"I mean it."

" . . . Hmmm . . . you know what you owe me?"

"What?"

"Nothing. I've never been happier than in these past few months. You really know how to treat a girl right. I never would've guessed that under that flirtatious exterior was a really sensitive, caring guy. But, you know what else?"

"What else?"

"In a way, I'm kind of glad that the whole thing with the Fire of Hate happened. I'm not sure how much longer it would've taken me to admit the way I felt to you. You tried though; I know you did, looking back. You were braver than me in those moments . . . and in so many more . . . Thank you Sprx. Thanks for being my friend for so long, and putting up with how I treated you . . . I love you." You smile so sincerely, my heart aches.

"Love you too babe. . . ." I see you try to stifle a yawn "Heh, how 'bout know we both get some sleep?"

I lean in, closing the space between us, and envelop your lips with mine. You taste . . . sweet . . .

"Mmm . . ." you murmur upon release "Good idea." and your eyes start to close.

I wrap my arms tighter around you, like I'm afraid to let you go alone into the dreamlands. I start to feel sleep pulling me into its depths and my eyes start to close as well.

Right before I fall into my subconscious, I think to myself;

"_When I hold you now, I think about how much I could never live without you . . . Good night, Nova . . ."_


End file.
